How To Win
Friends and Influence People
by
Kate Delany
There were
these older kids, see. And they had stuff. All kinds of
stuff. One of ’em supposedly had a shotgun and a whole box
of bullets. But that wasn’t what interested Reese and
Dakota. These older kids, they had firecrackers. And for so
long, so, so long, Reese and Dakota had been trying to get
their hands on firecrackers. So as far as Reese could see,
they had to make friends with them. Then maybe they’d sell
them their firecrackers.
It’s just these older kids, they weren’t so interested in
talking to them. What do babies like you two think you’re
doing talking to us, asked a chubby boy who seemed to be in
charge? Around him stood two other kids, flanking him
tight. Hesitantly, Reese mentioned the firecrackers. Did
they really have some? Because that’s what they heard.
What would I tell babies like you for, the boy said and the
two kids beside him shook with laughter, as if they’d
caught it by standing too close. We got money, Reese
explained as he opened his palm, displaying the saved
allowance, the banked lunch money, the extra funds Dakota
had gotten somewhere, probably stolen from his dad’s wallet
or skimmed from one of those take-a-penny, leave-a-penny
jars on store counters, though he refused to say because
that’s how Dakota could be sometimes, annoying. The chubby
boy frowned, unimpressed, then the lanky kid next to him
made a big show of cupping his hand around the chubby boy’s
ear and whispering something to him. The chubby boy’s gaze
shifted from Reese’s palm to Dakota’s face. Well, we’re not
gonna just sell them to anybody, he said. Then looking
directly at Dakota, he added, and I sure ain’t gonna sell
’em to the Mayor’s son. How dumb do you think I am? Before
Reese could reply, Dakota answered, I don’t know. How dumb
are you? The fence of older boys rumbled a little and from
where he stood, a good arm’s length away from Dakota and
wishing he was even further, Reese rumbled a little with
irritation too. What was Dakota doing? He was gonna mess
everything up!
We won’t tell anyone, Reese said. We swear, really, we
won’t! The chubby boy “hmmphed.” Yeah right, he said, like
you two babies aren’t gonna run right home and tattle,
sure! Reese turned and stared meaningfully at Dakota who at
last chimed in weakly, we won’t. The tone wasn’t that
friendly or enthusiastic but at least the words were right.
Well, you gotta pay double, the older boy insisted, on
account of his dad being Mayor. Alright, Reese said. Then
suddenly a few more words slipped off his tongue, unbidden:
You know my dad’s Deputy Mayor. All the kids turned and
gave him a quizzical look then, Dakota included. But it was
just he was so sick of hearing all day long about Dakota’s
dad being Mayor when no one mentioned his dad being second
in charge and that was still pretty good, even if his dad
wasn’t as important as Robin, who was Mayor and Reese’s
dad’s best friend; even if he wasn’t fun or cool or popular
like Robin. Well you can pay triple if you want, the chubby
boy said. No, Reese muttered, I was…never mind. Anyway, the
chubby boy continued, you gotta do something first to prove
you’re worth selling to. Alright, Reese said hesitantly,
what? At this, the three older boys decided they needed to
have a secret powwow and walked a few paces off. Reese and
Dakota just stood and watched them whisper, since their own
private meeting just consisted of Reese hissing, don’t do
anything stupid, Dakota, and Dakota responding, shut up,
Reese.
When the boys returned, the chubby kid said, okay, what was
gonna happen was they were all gonna walk over to the
creek, which Reese noticed the boy pronounced “crick,” just
like his own dad did. Then one of you’s gonna hold his
breath underwater till we say so, and the other’s gonna
hold ‘em down to make sure he don’t cheat. Then you’ll
switch. So what do ya say? the older boy asked Reese,
leaning forward and leering. Can you do that? Or are you
babies too scared? Part of Reese, a big part, wanted to say
no, never mind, they didn’t want the firecrackers that bad
since he had a serious, abiding fear of water ever since
the time his father decided to teach him to swim by
throwing him in a pool and Reese hit his head and nearly
drowned. But Dakota gave the older boys a simpering, almost
bored looking smile then began walking towards the creek.
Dakota would do anything, anything stupid thing at all. No
one knew that better than Reese. A lot of the time, Reese
used this for his own personal amusement. He could egg
Dakota on into doing most anything, pulling any stupid
prank where inevitably he’d not just get caught but most
likely break his arm in the process too. Their fathers
bickered sometimes jokingly, sometimes more bitterly, about
who encouraged who. Usually Reese figured it was him but
maybe this time it was Dakota. After all, Dakota knew all
about Reese’s fear of water. You’re not afraid of anything,
Reese remembered saying to Dakota once. He meant it as a
compliment, thought it was a nice thing to say. It was
something Reese would love someone to say to him, at any
rate. But Dakota answered back, no, I’m afraid of
everything. It just looks the same. Reese didn’t know what
that meant and that always irritated him, when he couldn’t
figure out what Dakota was talking about and had to just
sit there and watch his friend stare wistfully off into the
horizon like there was something Dakota saw there that
Reese couldn’t.
When they got to the creek, Dakota whispered to Reese,
don’t worry, I’ll go first. Oh, he guessed he was supposed
to say thanks! As if this had been just his plan! As if
Dakota didn’t want the firecrackers too! Well, he wasn’t
gonna say thanks! Instead he just muttered, whatever, and
Dakota gave him a look like he had x-ray vision and could
see Reese’s stomach all knotted up in fear as soon as they
waded into the creek, as soon as his little toe dipped into
the water. How was he going to do this? How could he even
begin to feign Dakota’s fearlessness? He had no idea. He
just hoped, just prayed maybe if Dakota did what the older
kids wanted, they’d be satisfied, give them the
firecrackers and let them go.
Okay, go! the chubby boy commanded and while Reese held
Dakota down underwater, he thought of all the strange,
stupid stuff they’d done together, not unlike this. For a
lot of the stupid stuff, Rosie had come along with them
except now it was like she didn’t want to hang around them
as much or something. You forget Rosie’s a year older than
you, Reese’s mother sometimes reminded him. Besides, she
doesn’t want to do all those ridiculous things you boys do.
He guessed maybe that was true but why? Why all the sudden?
It used to be good enough, the stuff they did together.
Recently, it had occurred to Reese that things were
changing, with Rosie in particular but maybe the world in
general, but he wasn’t sure why and certainly wasn’t sure
what to do about it. One instance stood out in his mind:
he’d been outside playing basketball with Rosie when he
noticed she had pink polish chipping off her nails. You
paint your nails, he asked? She answered with a shrug and a
quick “sometimes” then she slapped the ball away from him,
shot and scored. What did it mean, he thought later? What
did it mean that Rosie had polish chipping off her nails?
Later that night, he mentioned it to Dakota. Had he ever
noticed? But Dakota just gave him a weird look so as far as
Reese could tell Dakota hadn’t noticed a thing, probably
also hadn’t noticed that sometimes when they were all
playing together outside you could see the criss-cross of
straps underneath Rosie’s shirt. But here was the troubling
part: when Reese and Dakota fought, which happened a lot,
somehow they seemed to be almost magnetized into tumbling
into fist fights with each other, Rosie always took
Dakota’s side, always, which Reese told himself must be on
account of Dakota being so small, the smallest kid in their
class, so small he had to sit up front with the girls for
class pictures.
The chubby boy began to count backwards slowly—ten, nine,
eight… Through the water, Reese studied Dakota’s face. He’d
been down there a long time. Reese felt sweaty, dizzy, just
thinking about it. He’d never really forgiven his father
for trying to teach him to swim like that but then again,
his father never really apologized, only his mother had, as
if she’d been the one who did it. His father believed
that’s how you learn things, the school of hard knocks. He
said it all the time. Reese hated when he said that.
Seven, six, five… Reese listened to the counting then
decided to distract himself again from the impending horror
of his turn. He thought of something else, something that
had happened since Rosie’s painted fingernails. The three
of them had decided to break into this house in town, this
old guy’s house. They weren’t gonna take anything. They
just wanted to know what it looked like inside since it was
all creepy and weird looking from the outside, like the
Addams Family’s house or something. It was Reese’s idea but
Dakota did all the work because no one could pick a lock
like Dakota. They snooped around the house and then in this
one room, there was this bar mounted to the wall, the kind
you do pull-ups on. At first, just fooling around, Reese
pretended to be the old man, trying to do pull-ups, all
shaky and rickety. Then he started to do them in earnest
because he could. He was one of the biggest kids in his
class. Maybe a little chunky, okay, but also tall and maybe
gonna be muscular one day. Rosie watched while Dakota
heckled. Oh yeah, like you’re so tough, Reese snapped back.
Instead of answering, Dakota fished a cigarette butt out of
an ashtray, relit it with an adjacent lighter then stomped
it out on his own arm. For a second, there was this
horrible smell of burning skin then both he and Rosie
starting yelling, oh my God, Dakota! What’s wrong with you?
Rosie ran into the old man’s bathroom and came back with
first aid cream and a band-aid. They had to leave after
that, Rosie was so upset. On the walk home, Reese whispered
to her that maybe they should tell Robin, ya know, just
because? Rosie nodded and told him she thought they better
because that was really scary. She looked at him like he’d
just done something really nice, thinking of this, and
smiled at him. Later, when Reese asked to speak to Robin
confidentially, Robin gave him the same smile, ruffled his
hair and told him he was a good friend. Reese guessed
Dakota didn’t agree though because for a week they didn’t
speak or play together. When he tried talking to Dakota,
Dakota just stared right through him in that Dakota-like
way. When at last they did start speaking again, Dakota
told him that now his dad made him go to counseling twice a
week, on account of the cigarette thing, not just once
anymore.
Four, three, two…Reese smiled down at Dakota, who squirmed
under the water the way people do when they have to pee. In
another second, it would be Reese’s turn to do this. He
wondered if doing something like this was as destructive as
burning yourself with a cigarette, if afterward he’d have
to go to counseling. But no, his father would never do
that. He’d just shake his head and grunt, what’s the matter
with you, boy? They were so different, his dad and Robin,
the Mayor and Deputy Mayor. Reese’s dad was his real dad
though while Robin was just Dakota’s adopted dad, a fact
Reese sometimes dwelt on with acute satisfaction. Really,
when you thought about it, Robin hadn’t even been Dakota’s
adopted dad for that long. Reese had known Dakota a lot
longer, back when he lived in other houses, with other
families. People got paid for taking Dakota in. He knew
that for sure because Dakota told him once. Watching Dakota
underwater now, he thought of the first time they’d ever
met. Reese caught Dakota eating out a trashcan. His parents
had thought there was a raccoon getting into their garbage
so when he saw Dakota there, Reese just strolled back into
the house and announced to his parents that it wasn’t a
raccoon. It was a kid. He thought they’d be pleased to
learn the truth but instead they just shoved him right back
out the door and told him well, invite him in! And that was
the start of it, the start of everything. After that,
Dakota was always at their house. Reese’s parents gave him
food, Reese’s old clothes, sometimes even shirts from one
of Reese’s little sisters since Reese’s sister’s clothes
fit Dakota better then Reese’s did, what with Dakota being
so little and all. Sometimes Reese liked Dakota hanging
around, having him for a constant playmate, but sometimes
he got tired of it. When he was in one of those moods and
when his parents weren’t watching, he’d stand out on his
front porch and wait for Dakota to approach. Then he’d
start throwing stones at him like he sometimes did with the
bony stray dog that slunk around the neighborhood sniffing
for scraps. Reese’s dad told him once that someday somebody
was gonna have to put that mangy thing out of its misery.
One time, a few days after he’d stood on the porch, waiting
for Dakota, rocks in hands, Dakota reappeared, cautiously
and opened his own cupped hands, offering Reese a
pocket-watch, a fancy lighter and a twenty. Reese took
these offerings and let Dakota back in again.
One! the chubby kid yelled, finishing his count. Alright,
your turn, he said to Reese but Reese didn’t respond.
Instead, he just stared down at Dakota, lost in thought. He
pictured that pocket-watch, that lighter, that twenty
dollar bill. Then he gazed over at the muddy bank of the
creek where he and Dakota had both left their stuff. What
was some junky watch and some dumb old lighter to Dakota
now, now that Dakota had expensive new sneakers and an iPod
resting in one of them, now that he had anything he wanted,
anytime? Reese knew exactly how much all this stuff cost
because Dakota told him, as if he wanted Reese to know that
now that he was the Mayor’s son he wasn’t eating out of
trashcans anymore.
And now everyone at school seemed to totally forget that
Dakota used to eat out of trashcans. They seemed to forget
too that there used to be this woman Lesley who visited
Dakota at school, who Dakota tried to pass off as his aunt
but Reese, on the sly, informed the other kids that Dakota
didn’t have an aunt, that she was his social worker. The
afternoon Reese leaked that information, Dakota was silent
all day at school but then after the bell rang and they
walked outside, he pounced on Reese and bloodied him up
good. Well, Reese’s father said, you have to remember
people act the way they’ve been treated and Dakota’s been
kicked around a lot. Reese didn’t really think that was a
good enough excuse for what Dakota did but months later, he
thought back to that remark when Lesley made a surprise
visit to his house one night. She asked to talk to his
parents alone but Reese listened in from the hallway. He
couldn’t hear everything but the gist of it seemed to be
that Dakota was in the hospital and when he got out, he’d
have to move again, go live with some new family. Reese’s
parents refused to fill in the gaps, which is why Reese
asked to go visit Dakota in the hospital. He figured he
could find out the whole story from Dakota himself. His
mother, whose eyes were already red from crying, stared
crying all over again when Reese asked this and told him
what a sweet boy he was but no, Lesley said that he and
Rosie shouldn’t visit just yet, not until Dakota was… not
so sick. So Reese never found out the whole story. But he
did find out that Robin went to visit Dakota everyday in
the hospital, even though it was Reese that had introduced
Dakota to Robin, even though they both idolized Robin, even
though they both followed him around, hoping to do little
favors or be invited along on errands. As soon as he heard
the news that Robin had decided to take Dakota in, to adopt
him, Reese was livid. It was so unfair! He’d met Robin
first! He’d tried to establish clear rules. Dakota was
allowed to hang around Robin’s but just as long as Reese
was there too. But then Dakota went behind his back. He
started hanging around Robin’s even when Reese wasn’t
there. And then, when Reese pointed this out to Dakota,
that he’d violated the rules, he went and told Robin what
Reese said! Reese was so embarrassed, and was embarrassed
even now thinking about the day Robin told him it really
wasn’t up to Reese to decide who could visit him and who
couldn’t. Reese insisted he never said such a thing. It was
Dakota. Dakota lies, he told Robin. Everyone knows that.
And he steals too. Reese thought Robin would be glad to
know this, especially if Dakota was going to be allowed to
be in his house without Reese’s supervision. But Robin
didn’t thank him. Instead, he said if Dakota was his
friend, he ought to treat him nicer.
Hey, the older kid yelled! Hey, I said let him up! Reese
wondered if Dakota could hear him because he started to try
and come up for air, to get loose from Reese’s grip. It
would be his turn as soon as Dakota came above water. It
would be his turn to do this. Reese thought this, then with
all his might, his jaw locked in a determined grimace, he
shoved Dakota back down, keeping him underwater and
pressing as hard as he could. Shit, Reese heard one of the
older kids mutter, he’s gonna kill that kid! Hey, man, you
gotta let him up! Hey, I said enough! But Reese didn’t
listen. He just pressed harder, harder, harder. Dakota
looked up at him through the water for a second like he was
confused. Then he started to struggle in earnest. Reese
heard one of the older kids speak up again. We better get
outta here, one of them yelled to the others. And just like
that, they took off running. It surprised Reese how glad he
was to see them go.
So was this it? Reese thought. Was this what it was like to
kill a person? It was kind of eerie, but felt surprisingly
good. He felt a rush of power, a confidence he never felt
at school, not in class or during gym, not even at home
around his parents and too many sisters. For a second,
Dakota almost got the better of him, almost fought his way
to the surface because Dakota was wiry and tough but not
tough enough this time. This time, Reese felt invincible.
He didn’t even wince or yelp in pain when he saw drops of
his own blood as Dakota clawed at him, digging impossibly
hard into Reese’s arms and hands to get free. Usually,
Dakota was so smart in a crisis but this time Reese just
watched dispassionately, as if from very far away, as
bubbles floated up through the water. First the bubbles
seemed to be strings of sentences, threats, pleas. Then
there just seemed to be one word repeated; Reese figured it
was his name being called again and again. It was stupid
for Dakota to use up his air like that. Didn’t he know
that? He watched Dakota flail frantically, his eyes wide,
terror-filled like some animal in a nature program on TV.
Under his grip, the tightest grip of his life, Dakota’s
body convulsed in a way that reminded Reese of something
he’d heard once—that the reason people’s bodies still
tremble even if they’ve hung themselves is because your
body never quits trying to live. Reese guessed this was
Dakota’s small body still trying to live, even though it
was the same body Dakota had stubbed that cigarette out on
once.
In another second, Dakota’s body went still. No more
bubbles. His eyes shut and his head bobbed back in a way
that reminded Reese of the head of a dandelion about to
snap off in a rough breeze. Reese wondered if he’d killed
him. He hoped he hadn’t because he wouldn’t know what to do
next. He let Dakota up and Dakota just floated there for a
minute. Reese yelled, Dakota! It would be just like Dakota
to kid at a moment like this, to play some terrible trick.
Reese decided to pull him out. He drug Dakota up on the
muddy bank and tried to focus on what to do next. All he
knew was he wasn’t gonna put his mouth on Dakota’s mouth.
Eww! Instead, standing over Dakota’s still body, Reese
nudged him with his toe, first gently then a lot harder,
almost a kick. And just like that, Dakota came back to
life, coughing and sputtering.
He coughed a few times, really hard, coughed, and coughed
and seemed to choke. Then he rolled over on his side and
threw up a lot of water and other stuff too, what looked
like chunks of food. Eww, Reese said out loud, gross. Still
oozing creek water out his mouth and nose, Dakota looked up
at Reese. He drew a few ragged breaths then attempted to
speak: you…you…you… And that, Reese decided, was all Dakota
was gonna be allowed to say. He pounced on him, knocking
Dakota, who’d just begun sitting up, back onto the ground.
I saved you, Reese said, grabbing Dakota’s hair and pulling
as hard as he could. Say it! Say it! No, Dakota panted, no,
you…you… you…No, Reese yelled, I saved you! Say it, Dakota!
Say it! Furious, he banged Dakota’s head hard against the
ground. It made contact with the rock just below it. I
saved you!, he shouted. I saved you! Say it! Again, Reese
slammed Dakota’s head down against the ground. After the
second time his head crashed against the rock, Dakota quit
fighting. When Reese heard him mumble okay, you…you saved
me, he let Dakota go then he watched him roll over on his
side and curl up, all small and soggy, his arms wrapped
around his head. Reese watched as Dakota, the same Dakota
who once stubbed a cigarette out on his own arm without
flinching, now whimpered into his muddy sleeves.
It was an uninteresting scene. Reese stood up and dusted
himself off. I’m going to get help, he announced cheerily
to Dakota, and when I get back you can tell everyone how I
did it, how I saved you. Reese walked off in the direction
of town. That’s where he’d find his father and Robin, he
knew. As he walked, he started to plan what he’d say. He’d
tell them something terrible had happened and immediately
they’d know it was about Dakota. After all, wasn’t it
always? He’d lead them to the creek. They’d follow,
panicked. Even Reese’s dad would be panicked, as if it were
Reese in trouble. When they reached Dakota, Reese knew
Robin would make a big fuss over him. More than once, Reese
had overheard Robin call Dakota baby, as in, baby, what
happened? Baby, what did you do to yourself this time?
Reese tried to tease Dakota about that because after all,
it was weird. Reese’s dad just called him by his name or
called him boy or, sometimes when Reese got the feeling his
dad was trying to be really nice, he called him son. But
Dakota just shrugged. He wasn’t embarrassed by that at all.
Now though, Reese knew they’d all look to him. And now when
they all looked his way—his dad, Robin, even Dakota
himself—he’d start to tell them how he’d done it, just how
he’d saved Dakota. Oh, he’d tell them a wonderful story.
And he’d start like this—there were these older kids, see.
Copyright
2009 by Kate Delany